Sunday, December 14, 2008

Top Dirty, Lying, or Lame Moves by Fast Food Places in '08

These are some things done by fast food restaurants that I hate.

5. Double Trouble at McDonald's

McDonalds is taking the double cheeseburger off the dollar menu and replacing it with something called a "McDouble." From "The world’s biggest restaurant company will replace the double cheeseburger with the McDouble. The new sandwich consists of two beef patties and a single slice of cheese, or one slice less than the double." This sucks because the DCB was a great buy at $1. On the other hand, it doesn't seem like there's any active deception with this one, so it's not as bad as some of these others. Plus I don't really like all that cheese anyway.

4. McDonald's gone Nuggnuts

Those nuggnuts commercials are so sick and terrible. Yes, I love that they invented the word nuggnuts. I also love that they put text of the screen like "Couple of Nuggnuts" and "Get a load of these Nuggnuts" and "Whadya Nuggnuts?" but everything else about them is gross and makes me want to die. Especially that one where they have a whole cake made of nuggets.

3. Speaking of Nuggets

How many nuggets come in a McNugget value meal? 6, right? I don't really know because I never get it, but Anna says its been 6 forever. Well, they changed the default nugget meal to 10-piece. You can still get the 6-piece meal, but you have to ask for it specifically. So if you just ask for straight nuggs, like you have your whole life, they'll give you the 10-piece. Sneaky move.

2. Footlong Foolers

A while back Subway started the "Five Dollar Footlong" promotion. At first, it was great. You could get any sub you wanted as a footlong, and it was only five dollars. A steal of a deal! I always got the buffalo chicken, since that's my favorite sub there. And then, one day, I ordered my footlong buff. chicken like always, and the girl rang it up and it was like seven dollars! I initiated the following exchange:

"I thought it was just five dollars for a footlong."

"No, that's over."

"Oh yeah? So why is the five dollar footlong sign still up on the window there?"

"It's just on select subs now."


The kicker is that it was like a four dollar swing for me, because I would've gotten a six-inch if I had known.

1. Wendy's Sizes Up

Since always, a "medium" size fountain drink refers to 21 oz. This is as universal as it gets in the fast food world. Wendy's decided to shift their sizes up, making what was formerly a medium drink a small. Not only did they not bother to inform anyone of this, they've started asking, when someone orders a value meal, "would you like that medium or large?" If you want the 21 oz size, the only reasonable amount of soda anyone should drink in a single sitting, you have to ask for the small specifically. This is #1 because, even after I figured out the trick, I fell for it about four more times.


  1. no see now, the double cheese thing is a deception because:

    A. who reads, especially to learn about thier food service needs?

    B. Aside from that I haven't seen any other add or promotion or even sign for it.

    C. I'm pretty sure double cheeseburger is still on the dollar menu at least at the drive up, while I didn't see any (Prominent) mention of the "mcdouble." In fact I couldn't even remember the name until you posted it here.

    D. If you order a double cheeseburger in the drive up with a mc chicken and therefore obviously a cheap meal, they don't tell you that its more expensive until time to pay. Nor do they say, "are you sure you don't want our new and stupid mcdouble? same price as before with less food involved?"

    E. The mcdonalds double cheeseburger was maybe one of my all time favorite foods and almost always got that with a mcchicken and a water for a delicious 2 dollar meal. Now its ridiculously priced and I will probably never get it again. Thanks for ruining everything.

  2. I get my food service news from Troy Brackett's Troy, however, has been oddly silent on these issues. Though he did break the news of the infamous Dinnertime Hempfield Subway Robbery!

  3. yeah. 5 dollar foot longs... i learned the hard way, too.

  4. i have no doubt that the mainstream restaurant media is in bed with these giant fast food corporations.

  5. Come to think of it i have been snookered by the 5 dollar foot long thing too. And while its not really sneaky or a lie, also what's the deal with subway having pizza? What happened to eat fresh? also why would they even think to have pizza anyway? I wish burger king would start offering a flame-broiled pizza. In other news, who votes that "broiled" is a super gross word?

  6. I knew something was up at Wendy's!
    I stopped going there, but didn't know why. This was the reason!

    I wish my subconscious would communicate it's knowledge to the rest of me sometime.

  7. since Burger King tastes about 100x better than McDonald's, I'm going against the word broiled being super gross. I couldn't tell you how many years its been since I ate anything from McDonald's. The real crime was when BK stopped having a double cheeseburger on their value meal for a buck. Granted, if I had any fortitude I'd go back to being a vegetarian. But I say fortitude be damned for now.

  8. That, and I've tried to throw a musical list together but am serious lacking in inspiration to explain each listing...that and I'm a horrible writer/explainer, lol.

  9. Do all Subways have pizza now? I thought it was either just limited availablity at places like Saint Francis, or maybe an experiment like how the Huntington Taco Bell served burgers and fries. Do all Subways also now offer quesadillas and "snack wraps"?

  10. scott, you don't have to explain each listing, just at least some of them. and you don't even necessarily have to "explain" you can just write crazed hyperbole or whatever else you want.

    I can't speak for all subways (man i wish i could, i should be thier offical spokesman), but I have been to several that seem to have pizza including a wierd gas station on on highway 30 which wouldn't seem like a place to experiment. I didn't pay much attention to the other menu items so i can't say whether they have quesedillas or not although I do feel like I have heard the word "snack wraps" recently. Plus that hilarious burger things at TB was an actual backyard burger restuarant not just TB offering burgers (which would have been way more funny and awesome.) Of course most fast food is hilarious, absurd, unhealthy and surprisingly tasty.

    Meanwhile, I don't think that the results of broiling are gross, but the word is definetly nasty.

  11. i agree that broil is a sick word, but for some reason, flame-broiled sounds fine to me. delicious, in fact.

    bryce: they've had commercials on tv for the quesadillas and pizzas, so i think it's everywhere.

  12. It should be noted that all Subway restaurants are franchise operations, meaning the owner (or franchizier) gets the final say on additional menu offerings such a pizza, pretzels, popcorn and bagel dogs.

  13. Good Point, Jonny, Especially on Bagel Dogs. That and Cal-mel Dogs.


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