Local Listings AKA Top Topps 50-21

Hey everyone. Let the listing commence. It looks like Paco is doing us a favor and splitting up his music list into smaller, more easily digestible lists. You will receive no such favor from me, however. My list is long and all mixed up. Deal with it. Does it make little to no sense to put these disparate, uniquely valuable releases in order in a single huge list? You bet. Here's the thing though: putting things in order is fun. Also: try and stop me. You can't.

I'll split my list into two parts, here's part one.

50. Mortuus Auris & The Black Hand – Sleep

This tape is basically a meditation on the activity of sleep, complete with a track for each major stage of the sleep cycle! I just got it recently...but it seems to be quite nice.

49. Clouwbeck - From Which The River Rises

This is UK friend Richard Skelton. His compositions are sometimes haunting, sometimes triumphant, always interesting. He also released the album Landings under his own name; it's really good too. Actually, maybe it should be in this spot instead.

48. Loscil - Endless Falls

This sounds exactly like what you would imagine given the title and cover art. The perfect sounds for a rainy day.

47. Black Swan - S/T

I've heard people compare this to Stars of the Lid, and I think that makes sense. This is a little more dramatic though. And crackly.

46. Games - That We Can Play

Games is the work of Daniel Lopatin of Oneohetrix Point Never (which will appear again later on the list). Here, Dan trades in....well, basically every characteristic attribute of OPN for these upbeat, dancy jams.

45. Benjamin Dauer - The Burning of Wine

Apparently, he makes scores for choreographed modern dance pieces. My feeling is, if I was asked to dance to this, I would probably roll around on the ground then fall asleep, due to these warm tones.

44. Four Tet - There is Love in You

Is it just me, or is this the first thing he's done in like eight years? In any case, I love these beats and sounds and chopped up vocals. Great album.

43. Zonotope™ - Crusing Through the Hypersphere of Resonance

Here's a fun little collection of short, catchy jammies. According to the internet, he is "one human channeling inter-dimensional entities," converting their energy-states into sound waves (although who isn't these days). Plus the song titles are awesome phrases like "Inserting the Galactic Disc" and "Scoping in my Virtual Zone"

42. Black Mountain Transmitter - Theory & Practice

Great guitar/synth drone.

41. Andrew Thomas - Between Buildings and Trees

Really nice piano-based ambient music, sliced and diced a bit for good measure.

40. Bas Vas Huizen - Plooibaars

So we can assume he's a vampire based on his name, right? I mean, this certainly sounds like the kind of drone that a vampire would make. Although, considering the title of the album (which I hope is pronounced "Ploo-ee-bars") he could be some sort of vampire/clown hybrid.

39. Asuna & Opitope - Sunroom

Asuna is some guy whose other stuff doesn't seem that good. Opitope is Chihei Hatakeyama and Tomoyashi Date. I feel like Chihei releases a ton of stuff that is kinda pretty good, but doesn't really stand out. I like this one a lot, however.

38. Chromeo - Business Casual

These guys sure know how to throw a party. They also sure know how to feature legs on the covers of their albums. For me, this album is about exactly as good as the first one. My only criticism would be that if you're going to have three remixes of a song on a fifteen song album (which I'm completely supportive of), maybe you should spread them out instead of putting them all right in a row at the beginning?

37. Concert Silence - Rain Furniture

Concert Silence is a collaboration between Matthew Robert Cooper (Eluvium) and someone named Charles Buckingham. It's a great release with lots of interesting sounds, but it's so so short. It'd be much higher on my list if it was three times as long but equally as good.

36. Jónsi - Go

This album is exactly what I hoped it would be when I heard he was making a solo album. On some songs, it still seems really weird to hear him sing in English.

35. Concessionaires - Skyline

Here's one that didn't totally live up to my expectations (the expectations I held during the five minutes between when I heard about it and downloaded it). Concessionaires is a collaboration between Brad Rose and Pete Fosco. Two good boys. The result is pretty good, but not as good as you would think.

34. Warning Light - Further On

Dense drones constructed using so many sweet layers of synth.

33. Mark McGuire - Living with Yourself

This is guitar-god Mark McGuire's first proper "album," although this distinction seems like a hilarious joke given the huge amount of music he's released over the last couple of years. At first, this one didn't do it for me, but it has grown on me to the point where I think it's the best thing he released this year. The Vacation Days tape would have to be a close second.

32. Sufjan Stevens - The Age of Adz

Sufjan's really letting it all hang out on this one, huh? So much the better, as far as I'm concerned. I can echo Paco's sentiment that I don't think I would have liked it as much if it had been in the same vein as his previous albums. On the other hand, I think I'll probably always love him no matter what he does.

31. Christopher Hipgrave - Slow, with Pages of Fluttering Interference

It might be more appropriate to truncate this title to Slow. Meaning I don't detect a great deal of interference here. Just short snippets of quiet, lovely tones.

30. Akira Kosemura - Polaroid Piano

I'm a sucker for sparse piano music like this. I took a lot of naps to this album in 2010.

29. Kontrolorgan - Interruption Songs

In the past, when I've heard something described as "psychadelic," I've often immediately dismissed it as something I'm not interested in. I'm not sure where this prejudice came from. Probably the term has broad usage and means many different things to different people. Whatever the reason, this bias of mine has been utterly destroyed this year by music such as this. "Psychadelic" is the first word people use to describe Kontrolorgan. To me, it just sounds awesome.

28. Michael Santos - Memory Maker

This guy really knows how to use white noise to great effect. Most of these tracks consist of nothing more than a simple tone awash with waves of bubbling, crackling static. The result is hypnotic.

27. Sundrips/Cloudland Ballroom - Split

I just got this the other day, but it seems awesome. Lots of great synths with occasional gentle beats.

26. Tallest Man On Earth - The Wild Hunt

Great folky tunes that never wear on you. I think it's definitely on par with Shallow Graves.

25. Lunar Miasma - Crystal Covered

While there's a lot of music on this list that you might call "outer space-oriented," this guy feels the most authentic to me. Like he's probably actually some kind of space being. Crystal Covered is intricately crafted in a way that rewards repeated and careful listening.

24. Baths - S/T

Off-kilter, stuttering beats and catchy melodies. Together forever.

23. Olan Mill - Pine

Also Lapses by Pausal is the same guy. Great ambient sounds via lots of organ and piano.

22. He Can Jog/ibreatheFUR - Split EP

The ibreatheFUR side of this tape is solid, but the He Can Jog side is just spectacular. "1981" has this sweet glitchy beat where you're not sure if you should be dancing or sitting very still. "The Green Green Green" is gorgeous. Two of my favorites of the year.

21. Pete Fosco - Breath Radiant

Pete really knows how to handle a guitar. He's not kidding around either. He assaults you with a wall of noisy distortion that you didn't even know you were asking for. But trust me, you were. "Dawn of the Sky Whales" is my favorite.

I'll be back with the exciting conclusion later.

Top 5 Indie Rockies and Such Like of 2010

Aw yes. We are back again. Because of complaints in that past about huge horrible lists, I have split mine into 4 lists. This is the first of the 4 because its the easiest. Actually they are all done but you know making them a post takes time n' stuff.

Top 5 Indie Rockies and Such Like of 2010

To be honest I didn't really listen to much Indie Rock this year or at least not new stuff. It seems to be a be where I am heading at least recently. Anywhere there were still a few good things to be had this year. Probably more but these are the 5 I listened to enough to put on a list. This list is probably pretty pointless because I think most of you have heard these anyway but whatever:

5. Toro y Moi - Causers Of This (Carpark)

I actually just downloaded this a few days ago, so I don't really know what I think but I needed to put 5 not 4 and this seemed pretty great. I was afraid it was chillwave when I first heard about it but it seems to be something better. Matt describes it pretty well in his list on his blog, so read that.





4. Sufjan Stevens - The Age of Adz (Asthmatic Kitty)

I kind of expected not to like this even though I mostly like Sufjan's stuff, although not as insanely as I would have a few years ago. However, turns out he's still great. As I said before (and no doubt the absolute first on the whole internet), It's basically like Soft Bulletin (i.e. when they were still important) Flaming Lips meets Jason Forrest (minus some of the insane smashing shit upishness). Plus of course quite a bit of Sufjan. Which are all goods things and things that I missed. Great work.

3. How to Dress Well - Love Remains (Lefse Records)

This is maybe not indie rock but anyway...

This is one of the few albums that I was recommended by the dreaded pitchfork where I actually followed their advice. I really expected it to be dumb boring garbage. But it turns out its totally great. I'm sure a million dudes have called it something like lo-fi R&B for ghosts, but that's pretty much exactly what it is. And I love it bad.


2. Ceo - White Magic (Sincerely Yours)

Honestly, I just found out about this on some year end lists. But I love The Tough Alliance (RIP!) bad and this is pretty much the exact same thing plus more new agey CG dolphins swimming through poorly rendered waterfalls type music (which is the best part). The only bad parts are how short it is and that actually I wish the best new agey parts where a lot more or all of it. Still with the songs, "Illuminata" and "White Magic" you can't really ask for more...except for much much more! I need more!

1. The Books - The Way Out (Temporary Residence Limited)

The Books! Still at it after all these years. Still sounding fairly much the same, which is good because its an awesome formula for success. There were a few weak tracks at the end, such as Free Translator and We Bought The Flood. But overall its still a great and inspiring album and attains many moments of "Books Catharsis." You know like, when real life becomes an awesome lazer and then it hits an awesome version of its ownself and makes you love life? Tiny collisions of real life and real life. And its great.


Still to come:
Top 10 Hip-Hop + R&B Albeems of 2010
Top 11 Electronic, Dupstep, Dance, House and similarities Jamz of 2010
and
Top 36ish Drone, Ambient, and Experimental Gemstones of 2010

You can call me Josh

It's that time again! List now or forever hold your teens! You've been warned!

waiting to do these:

Hey ya'll, Frodos.

True love waits. and also, i'm waiting to post more lists until a few things:
#1. i have more TIME
#2. I have time to THINK
#3. I watch more x-files.

but i also, like paco, wanted to give you a preview of the lists i'm going to be posting like a ghosting.
#1. top albums of significance to moi
#2. top hip hop songs of the year
#3. top things i wanna check out come the new year
#4. reasons why i need a new job
#5. reasons why i don't.
#6. tip top top hats
#7. as etiquette goes, things to NOT say to people who have just had a baby.
#8. Or maybe, in social situations, things to NOT say. this might help a few of you... or at least this might help a few people who a few of us know or don't know
yeah, i'm burning on ya.

i would post my top ideas for tattoos. HOWEVER, I KNOW YOU ASSHOLES WOULD STEAL THEM
so i'm not.

Top Several Lists I'm planning on making but didn't have time to make yet.

Too Bizaay! This list is pointless but I want to feel like i was contributing (unlike Hans Anderson) to the site so there. If time will hold me well:

1. Top 10 MoovaayS!
2. Top Some number korean street foods!
3. Music is divided up into three catergories because last year my list was too long. So this year it is still too long but I've cheated it into three fake catergories so it seems more digestible:
a. Top 10 Hip-Hop Albums
b. Top 15 Indie Rock/Electronic/Not the other two catergories
c. Top 25 Drone/Ambient/Experimental/Other stuff
4. Top 35 Sweetest Blades of all time
5. Top 10 Sexiest ways to hold your ground
6. Top 6 Ways to sex up your trip to the post office
7. Top 100 Celeb tips for going to the library...covered in granola barzzzz, whowh!
8. Best Zany Granny Fatties of the new millenium
9. Worst ways that I totally slaughtered homeless dudes in the dark of night
10. Worst ways to spell "tanny" or "blads" or "tanny blads"
11. Coolest new hairdoos and hairdoo nots of jazz

Top Scotts, Tod Dogs

I really wanted to get this list out quick. I knew that if I waited to long, then all my favorite jams would appear on someone else’s list. So here they are. The top 10 songs of 2014

10. Paper Mouth Times “Tell me tell me can you talk to moms?”

This one almost didn’t make the cut. But I have been listening to a lot of music in the past few days trying to make this list, and for the past few days I can’t quit singing “I need a girl who can handle my affairs, everyone knows I don’t like dealing with parents, tell me can you talk to moms, baby can you talk with dads too?” Paper Mouth Times might have made a few mistakes this year (“Last Week’s Tiles”, “Baby Grabbing”), but this wasn’t among them.

9. Tim’s Sister Jen “ That bag has lots of straps”

What can we say? 2014 has definitely been the year of the strap. Yet T.S.J. manages to jump aboard the band wagon and take us in a whole new direction. T.S.J. may not be subtle about their love of pop culture, but that’s what makes this song so good. Indeed, all anyone can think about is straps, but never before have we thought about them with such a sense of belonging.

“How many straps? What? How many straps? Lots!”

8. In the Time of Clips “No shoes, no shirt, no crystals”

The beauty of this song lies in its simplicity. The way the synths and pads dance around Hester’s dream like voice makes us almost wonder if we she is even really singing at all, or if these words are materializing directly into our brains. “I need 7 crystals to perform a magic ritual of healing, or my grandma is a gonner. Sorry dude; can’t you read the sign? Yeah but I’ve got all the other stuff, all that’s left is the crystals. Please. She’s really bad off. Beat it punk.” You can’t make that shit up.

7. D.J. Snakey Dick “Oh shit, Sherlock”

The first time I heard this song, my friend Jim looked at me and said “That’s it, I’m done.” We knew that this was gonna be big. We’ve got ourselves a double decker dance anthem on our hands. The constant chugging of the bass, the slip stream riffs of the guitar. Who hasn’t walked out of a club chanting “The Baskervilles train arrives at 12 o’clock, all aboard hell hound, oh shit Sherlock.”

6. Toronto Cat Cam “the littlest cakes ever”

What lead singer Marsh Billers lacks in size, he sure as hell makes up for in sound. His voice is like a two ton cannon blasting out menthol cigarettes and postcards marked “wish you were here. . .NOT”. Toronto Cat Cam’s live show is a tour de force in dreams and neighbors. The playful bigotry between Billers and drummer Larry Phrases is a delight to behold onstage.

5. Seth Towns “Why do all the girls love Brandon?”

It seems like Seth Towns arrived out of nowhere. Last years “Dammit, Brandon” planted a subconscious seed in our minds. Town’s online only release of “Tell me that’s not Brandon over there with Sara Tiffanies” pulled us in slowly and wrapped its sultry honky tonk tentacles around our hearts. But what really got us was the smooth jazzy, alt country styling’s of “Why do all the girls love Brandon?” I’m sure we haven’t heard the last of Seth Towns, or Brandon for that matter.

4. Darcy and the Pitbulls “Mary had a little bottom” (Strap Gift remix)

It might have been a slow year for Darcy and the Pitbulls, but London’s Strap Gift took us for the ride of a lifetime. Strap Gift has somehow managed to turn the unlistenable “Mary had a little bottom” into an all out rock riot of raucousness. Yes “Mary had a little bottom, whose size was small and dull” but this is definitely a different Mary and a different bottom than the one dreamt of by Darcy and the Pitbulls.

3. Dillby Paters “This time it’s money”

We were all shocked to learn that Flame Johnson was calling it quits and leaving Now that’s My Deals. But who would have thought that fledgling drummer Paters would rise from the ashes that was Deals and release an astounding solo debut? Not Chad, that’s who. Paters hit single “This time it’s money” showed the world that he meant business and business is good. Some may call Paters music experimental, but I say the experiment is on you, asshole!

2. 5% of 12 is Horse Cock “bbbbbbbbbbbbbbtt”

“bbbbbbbbbbbtt” is the kind of song that is full of swirls and eddies, tides and tidies. Somehow it manages to be both crisp and blunt at the same time. At once loud and not as loud. It’s the paradox that lovers of 5% of 12 is Horse Cock have come to know and love. In his sing songy style A. A. Milne reminds us that “life is a nice time. Nice times are icy parts and party pants. Patty is definitely a ho. Now everybody stand and do a tammy dance!”

1. The Mighty Mighty BossTones “Take your stacks of things NOW!!!”

The world was stunned with the announcement that the legendary Bosstones would finally be releasing their long awaited follow up to Pin Points and Gin Joints, but the biggest surprise of the year came when we found out that in fact, they’ve still got it. “Take your stacks of things NOW!!!” picks up right where they last let off, only more in your face than ever before. The horns and the chants and the skank parties are all still there, except now they are all multiplied sevenfold and many more times. I tried to count how many times in a day I saw someone listening to their ipod supreme mouthing the words “don’t make me spray you with some water, don’t make me put my hand in your face, don’t make me tell you that your silly, take your stacks of things NOW!!!”, but there were just to many to count.

We can only hope that 2015 brings more of what we love, and what we love is all these songs I mentioned in the aforementioned list above this sentence.

Top 2 great incidents with old korean men in the past two days including right now

2. Talked on the subway for a long time with this old dude who was an army cook for the american army during the korean war and then later in saudia arabia for some reason for 16 years.

He just came up to me and started talking. He was old looking but not the 78 he said he was. the best part of all of it was that he spoke english with an italian american accent and said things like "pizza pie" and "sawsage." It was the best and he invited me to come visit the school he is a night watchman at sometime and he will cook me cheeseburger or a pizza pie. There are lot more things right now but because of number one on this list i can't type very well.

1. Got Forced Drunk With a lot of Korean Old men.

Today was some kind of festival in our small village center so we went to go serve a bunch of old dudes delicious meats and items. But the old dudes love me because I'm the wierd white guy in the room, so especially this one old dude with a trachiotomy so I can't understand a single thing he is saying especially in korean, really loved me and wanted me to drink lots of Soju (A sort of Korean Rice Vodka) with him and his old buds. I managed to escape after only having three double shots and a half shot, so I'm not totally out of it here at 2 pm but I have taken some affect into my blood stream and conciousnesssssssssssssss. But it was really hilarious and no way to avoid it and now that old man loves me bad. They also asked me to dance and since some kaorake but i had to leave out of there real bad, don't I had it! Oh those olds and there olds mans days!

Update: woah, I'm tired now!!!!

Top 500 Historical Heads of State: 500-496

500. Francis Joseph II


State: Liechtenstein

Reign: 1938-1989

Likes: neutrality, profitting from the Holocaust, women's rights

Dislikes: Jews



499. Selim II


State: Ottoman Empire

Reign: 1566-1574

Likes: orgies, debauchery

Dislikes: everything else about being the Sultan



498: Jie of Xia


State: China

Reign: c. 1625 B.C.

Likes: oppression, his concubine Mo Xi

Dislikes: not being carried around on a sedan chair


497. Sir Hector Horace Hearne

Note: There is some question as to the authenticity of this image.

State: Kenya

Reign: 1951-1954

Likes: Roman Law, taking it easy

Dislikes: Africans



496. Arturo Frondizi


State: Argentina

Reign: 1958-1962

Likes: Doing funny looks with people, as evidenced here.

Dislikes: foreign investment in things other than oil

22 Ways to Improve Twilight: New Moon Including 21 Songs from 2009 and One Fight Scene: PART ONE

I heard that Twilight: New Moon had a pretty decent soundtrack. Good for Mormon Vampires, I say. Or kudos, if you like. But knowing how I know more about tuneage that your average Mormon music supervisor in Palo Alta, California, here are a batch of songs that would have catapulted the movie to a whole new level of outstandingness. Like War Games outstanding. So even though I haven't seen the movie, I have seen the trailer enough times to understand the basic plot, and understand how sweet songs would make this already awesome movie even awesomer. Here is the trailer for those of you who have been living in Uruguay filtrating water or combating soil erosion.



Understand the awsomeness? Obviously you do. Now here's how it gets even awesomer.

WARNING: Real and/or fake SPOILERS ahead.



The Cool Kids - Knocked Down - Opening song for the film. A montage of Bella, Edward and Jacob waking up and getting ready for school. Choosing the right lid, lacing up their kicks, throwing on a sick polo. Toe-to-head shots of each of them leaving their houses, loading into an Escalade (I don't care if the werewolf and the vampire don't really interact, this scene is cooler than "continuity"), popping the moon roof, and exiting slow motion into the school parking lot.



Animal Collective - My Girls - This song plays way before Edward breaks up with Bella so he won't be tempted to kill he by drinking her blood. In a happy moment, Edward give Bella a piggy back ride while swinging from trees in Washington State like a pale monkey. What? He doesn't swing from trees? Well he does in this movie. Because it would make a memorable scene. What a joyful swing in the trees it would be with this song playing! Bella whooping! Edward smiling! Bella laughing! Edward wanting to drink her blood! Bella biting her lip! Future Edward breaking up with her because of what happens in the every next scene!



Dan Deacon - Paddling Ghost - This song plays during the birthday party for Bella. It's all fun and games until Bella gets a paper cut and some vampire dude tries to waste her. What a douche. But until then, kickass boat party with vampires and ghosts and pirates and cuddly, hand-gesturing horses. Bill Murray makes a cameo appearance as Peter Venkman.



Beyonce - Halo - This song will play while Edward breaks up with Bella because he's afraid he or his family members will try to drink her blood or something similarly inappropriate. The lyrics will opposite-reflect the current state of Bella and Edward's relationship. Regardless, Beyonce is freaking beautiful and I could watch this video all day. Also, angels.



Richard Swift - The Atlantic Ocean - This song plays while Edward takes a plane across the ocean to Europe. There will be a comedy of errors in which he will miss his original flight, take an alternate flight to France, walk around like Charlie Chaplin in City Lights complete with stache and cap, misplace his flower, eat some cheese and crusty bread, fight some sweet robot dancers who are terrorizing the French, then hitch hike across the alps to Italy. There will be a graphic novel tie-in chronicling his further adventures exclusive to Barnes and Noble.



Grizzly Bear - Two Weeks - This song plays as we get to understand the monotony of Bella's life post-Edward. She wakes up. Cries. Goes to school. Cries. Takes notes in chemistry. Cries. Eats lunch with new BFF Werewolf. Cries. Doesn’t worry about her boyfriend wanting to kill her for her blood. Cries. Does wicked hard daredevil stunts after school on motorcycles with Werewolf. Cries. Tries emailing her vampire boyfriend but remembers that he doesn’t know how to use technology because he's 108 YEARS OLD AND CAN’T LEARN THE COMPUTER BOX! Cries. This scene will break your heart!

*****

Up Next: Songs from Wye Oak and Raekwon, plus French dance crazes. Stay tuned.

Top Albums of the Duckade: 10-1

10. Fennesz - Endless Summer

The main thing here is the title track, which sounds like Beach Boys for the post-apocalyptic summer. It feels as though there's a radioactive haze around everything that, rather than being suffocating, only serves to make the few moments of total exposure all the more delicious. The rest of the album rules too.



9. The Avalaches - Since I Left You

This one is so nice. The very first track invites us to come in and to have a drink and a good time. And I swear to God, every time I really think to myself, "Yeah? Okay, I will."



8. The Unicorns - Who Will Cut Our Hair When We're Gone?

I had totally forgotten about this one until I started making this list, but as soon as I saw it I knew it was going to be up there. These are great death-obsessed yet impossibly bright pop songs.




7. Sufjan Stevens - Illinois

You know the drill. Sufjan is awesome, and this is the best one.



6. Wolf Parade - Apologies to the Queen Mary

A couple of boy geniuses.



5. Panda Bear - Person Pitch

I guess this is Animal Collective's representative in my top ten. This is probably the best thing any of them did this decade, although everything they do is awesome. If this was a list of top artists, Animal Collective would be #1.




4. The Books - Thought For Food

All but the broadest definitions would probably question whether the The Books is music. Analytically, it's pretty much just sequences of samples plus some cello. However, when you actually listen to it, there's no question that it is not only music, but awesome jams. I guess you just have to follow your heart!




3. Manitoba - Up in Flames

A lot of you probably think this one is too high, and I'll admit it's partly here for sentimental reasons. This was really the first electronic music that I listened as more than a joke. However, it's still some of the most lush and vibrant music of any genre that I've heard. I feel that his more recent releases pale in comparison.




2. The Microphones - The Glow Pt. 2

While making this list, I focused on thinking about not what I listened to this decade, but how. The albums at the top of my list are ones that I listened to in a very intentional way. This one is a great example. There have been so many times when I wanted to listen to this album and this album only. And by listen I mean pretty much just sitting there, listening. I think that's the sign of a good one!




1. Yo La Tengo - And Then Nothing Turned Itself Inside Out

The other day I was talking to Bryce about his top albums, and he mentioned that for him, each album has an associated memory of listening to it while driving somewhere with a particular person or group of people. This got me thinking that, probably, all art is fundamentally about processing memory: either specific memories of individuals or an inherent collective Platonic memory of the ideal.

I bring this up because my top album is really about memory itself. The lyrics make this apparent, but you can easily tell if you ignore the words altogether. It's evident in the slowness, patience, and tenderness these songs exhibit. For me, this album serves as a kind of universal nostalgia. Somehow, it reminds me of everything. That's why it's my top tog.

Next up is my list of top 500 historical heads of state.